Collected thoughts in words.
Writing helps me digest ideas that I’m exploring or learning from reading. When an idea shows itself worthy, I collect my notes and post them here - after sharing via my newsletter, Side Notes.
Life’s most impactful decisions are not complex or complicated.
Stay in shape, be a good person, spend less than you make, and eat well. These sound simple, but none are easy. They are especially difficult with the pressures of life, compounded by constant consumption.
This is why I aim to focus on simple, not easy actions in life. It’s the path to worthy outcomes.
On walking - the soul’s cure all.
Walking outside is a luxury most can afford. Beyond enjoyment and health benefits, walking is useful for more than you might think.
"Demons Hate Fresh Air" is one of my favorite Kleon-isms. This truth comes to mind daily. Going for a walk is the best simple solution if I’m feeling cloudy, cranky, stuck on a project, frustrated with someone, in need of new ideas, or trying to solve a problem.
No matter what I’m lacking, mentally or physically, walking can help. Especially now. It’s an enjoyable act that I can do from our front door. continue reading…
On consumption - living in informational poverty.
It's so easy to consume that we skip trying to understand or learn something new from what we read. The overabundance of information distracts us from thinking for ourselves. There are too many inputs bidding for our attention. We need to be deliberate when choosing what to consume. In most cases, the default should be less.
Stepping away is our only chance to increase our quality of thinking. We must pause before we pursue. It's a struggle to digest anything with content to consume around the clock. Once we pause our inputs we can begin to digest new ideas. continue reading…
On creativity - using constraints usefully
Constraints improve creativity, increase productivity, and make life more enjoyable. They provide clarity when presented with seemingly infinite options. If this sounds counter-intuitive, let me dig into it and see if it makes more sense.
Benefits of creating real or arbitrary limitations continue to show up in my reading. I am better with clear restrictions or deadlines for a project and I’m guessing I’m not alone. Without tangible ways to show progress, it’s difficult to stay motivated and push hard in any direction. continue reading…
On belonging - life’s margin of safety
How do we create a margin of safety for our psychological lives?
We cultivate a sense of belonging. Life is better with other people (yes, even for introverts; this is coming from a strong INTJ). The most impact comes from our connections with people around us and in our community. Developing these connections is a slow process. It will take more time and effort than you expect, as anything worthwhile does. This is also how they become so powerful.
By building connections with others, we become resilient to the messiness of life. As these connections are tested, they are strengthened. The more often you are there to help others, the stronger trust grows and both parties can handle tougher situations. continue reading…
On commitment -
Two fantastic items I read recently were pulling at a similar idea that I've been thinking about - Optionality is limiting you and fulfillment comes from long-term commitment.
This idea is applicable to nearly every aspect in life. By definition, the only way to benefit from compounding's power is to commit and stick with something for a long time. Each time you switch, you start back at a lower level. Avoiding committing to something is cutting short your potential outcomes.
Wendell Berry's Port William stories speak of a membership among the family, friends, and neighbors of a small agricultural town in Kentucky. His "membership" idea is similar to community but much deeper and better. The membership exists because of proximity and the characters commitment to living together through whatever comes their way; grieving and the celebrations.
David Perell's most recent essay, Hugging the X-axis, clearly discusses why long-term commitment it rarer today yet the benefits of it are as great as they have ever been. In a Berry-esque line, he provides one reason why, "Freed from the ties of kin and place, people aren’t bound by the traditional virtues of honor and loyalty, which are two of the defining pillars of a commitment-heavy culture."
He points out that opportunity and optionality are often inversely correlated. David also references G.K. Chesterton who beautifully argues, “Men did not love Rome because she was great. She was great because they had loved her” and Chesterton argues that people are ultimately fulfilled not by riding the bandwagon but by acts of commitment — loving, working, and tending to things worthy of care and affection.
This aligns directly with Berry's philosophy of people constantly searching for a better place. "There is no "better place" than this, not in this world. And it is by the place we've got, and our love for it and our keeping of it, that this world is joined to Heaven."
When you commit to anything, you're deciding what's important by your actions. You're choosing how to spend your time, money, energy, and focus. Make sure you're investing in future outcome you actually want. By making the right commitments we find the type of freedom that ultimately fulfills and uplifts us.
Related: This essay, The Trouble with Optionality
On mountains - lessons for living
Time spent in the mountains provides tangible reminders of many lessons for life. I’ve curated eight notable ones here…
On friendship - a courageous battle
Friendships are powerful. In the presence of friends we talk, listen and feel differently. Usually, for the better. Ralph Waldo Emerson explains this well in his beautiful Friendship essay. I want to write some of the ideas down to remember now, and later.
We should treat friendship with the roughest of courage says Emerson.
“When friendships are real, they are the solidest things we know.”
This is not arguing or fighting but caring. We learn a lot from how our friends respond in raw moments. If they care enough to be honest, show forgiveness and call out our faults, then joy may flow from that relationship for years to come. continue reading…
On leadership - leading through turbulence
These lessons were gleaned from the wonderful book, Leadership: In Turbulent Time by Doris Kearns Goodwin.
This is one of the best books on leadership, history, and decision making I have read. The author has spent almost 50 years writing about Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, Franklin D. Roosevelt, and Lyndon B. Johnson. She summarizes crucial moments each of the four leaders experienced during their lives and, in particular, their time in the White House. Her writing is refreshing, useful, and enjoyable to read. The book is focused on the hardships they each went through and how they lead the nation during different times of crisis.
On wisdom - thoughts from Epicurus
Epicurus was a philosopher in ancient Greece. The purpose in his school of thought was to attain a happy, tranquil life consisting of a freedom from fear, absence of pain, and living self-sufficiently among friends. I would argue fear and pain are important parts of living but I strongly agree that friendships are essential to a happy life. Recently I came across a quote of his that made me think.
He once said that “the wise will accomplish three things in their life: leave written works behind them, live financially prudent and provide for the future, and cherish country living.”
I agree with Epicurus these are all worthy aims. continue reading…
On doing less - Side Notes Year 1 Recap
I learned a lot about creativity with one year of 📫 Side Notes. I’m aware of its power and more convinced all humans share a deep desire to create. Once an idea takes flight, it can take a life of its own. It’s fun to watch something you create become something you didn’t expect. I’m certain this letter will continue to change and I strive for the better. Some of my ideas were ok, but the writing was poor. I hope to improve my writing noticeably. Thanks for hanging in there, especially during those first few letters. I'm happy I began and put some words out there. continue reading…
QUALITY - The Feeling With No Name
VALUES - What Should You Work On
How to Create a Memorable Gathering
Gathering with others is powerful. It has the potential to be very impactful for the individuals involved. Unfortunately, most gatherings are forgotten as soon as they finish. It’s evident when a gathering has been thoughtfully designed. Sometimes this isn’t noticed until it's complete because the facilitator actively built invisible structures to create a specific feeling, emotion, or outcome. Even so, when it’s been well planned you usually notice (and hopefully appreciate) the time and effort someone put into it.
It's easy to get caught up in logistics when planning a gathering. It’s rare when you can tell the planner was intentional about creating a memorable experience. This is why we notice when an event impacts us in a deep way, positively or negatively. It’s more common to show up, go through the motions, and leave an event as if we were adding another tally mark to a chart of things we’ve experienced this year. continue reading…
Purposeful Gathering
Gathering with friends, family, co-workers, and community members is important for fulfillment and health. Of course, they are also entertaining and wildly enjoyable. It’s proven that increasing social interactions and connecting with others regularly is better for our satisfaction, mental health, and confidence. However, these gatherings, events, meetings, and get-togethers can be improved. With some forethought, we can elevate these experiences drastically with slight adjustments.
This topic comes after reading Priya Parker’s book The Art of Gathering. She shares several ways for meaningful social connection. I’d like to share the core ideas that I believe are the easiest to implement into personal or professional gatherings and see immediate improvements. continue reading…
Letters to a friend…
Graduating College and Weighing Different Options
Eric asked for this. A real Annual Review to use.